Not A Hoax: Donald Trump Is Bigfoot

In the year 1967, when the legendary Patterson footage that depicted what many believed was the missing link, an upright walking furry beast strolling through a California forest nicknamed “Bigfoot”, President Donald Trump, often criticized for his shady political monkey business, was turning 21 years of age. The unknown subject looked like some kind of alien ape, but nobody has ever been able to figure out the puzzle.

It is my determination after careful analysis, that the mythical monster can now finally be named.

Donald Trump Is Bigfoot

The mystery behind the actual identity of the creature has alluded scientists for over five decades since the infamous sighting. Is it a person dressed in a monkey suit?

Or is there a much more sinister explanation behind the existence of a potential shapeshifting entity from beyond that is a hybrid alien who can fool the masses into believing there is a rogue monster roaming around our national parks in America?

Recently, I reported on Trump’s secret visit to Santa Monica, California this year, wherein he purportedly attended a meeting with the top alien hierarchy who are at the helm of the New World Order.

Despite the recent Bigfoot information dump by the FBI, I guarantee that nobody will take what I write seriously, instead most will be left scratching their heads like confused chimps when trying to figure it out for themselves. No matter what… I wanted to dig deeper and see if I could redeem myself as a journalist.

Just like I introduced my theory to the world two years ago, that late SOUNDGARDEN rocker, Chris Cornell, was murdered for getting too close to exposing an elite pedophile ring operating out of Washington DC.. You can either choose to sit back and have a good laugh or you can get serious about the dire situation that humanity currently faces.

As readers will recall, the scandal called #Pizzagate got turned into a late night joke.

My work on the case has been called a hoax, although I provided a mountain of evidence that proves foul play was involved and the entire ordeal connects with both the deaths of Seth Rich and Mr. Cornell.

I also went a step further to push my bold theory that the fallen rock idol was actually an alien hybrid who was destined to be sacrificed for Satan.

But it was not until I posted my latest thesis offering the shocking scenario that President Donald Trump is also himself a shapeshifter from another dimension, posing as a human being on earth today, that people really started to get angry with my reporting.

Some of the premiere sites on the internet have given my writing the spotlight as the world’s leading conspiracy theorist and prankster.

Should I take that as a compliment or as an insult?

All that really matters to me in the end is that the truth about what is happening gets put out there, whether people are ready to handle the facts or not.

The disappearance of millions of kids in America over the past decade, has many speculating that there is much darker explanation behind this supposed invasion of the body snatchers.

The alien ape man with two sets of tits continues to baffle millions…

The fact is that the FBI has issued very few details about their Bigfoot investigation to the American public until the new info dump online, along with the reality that each year in America, over one million kids go missing, leading one to believe that the Commander In Chief and the people who run the United States government know a lot more than they are letting on.

Is it indeed possible that Bigfoot is the one behind all of the abducted kids? Are these stolen children being provided as a food source to this Satanic alien beast from beyond? Are the cults around the USA covering up the shocking reality?

Many Trump supporters will say there is no truth to the tales of rape and murder by the hands of the alleged monster Donald Trump and his buddy, Jeffrey Epstein.

I am here to tell all of you that Donald Trump eats babies whole.

Until others step forward with a better explanation behind this strange ET phenomena, the only plausible way to explain how destructive the Trump administration has been since he took office, is to call the orange bozo a BIG APE. It’s not like he hasn’t been called that before by women he has purportedly attacked while visiting Epstein’s island retreat, right?

At any rate, it definitely seems that Mr. Trump is even less concerned with the safety and well being of thousands of illegals immigrants who unlawfully invaded America, and should have been sent back to their homelands safely a long time ago, in my humble opinion. Instead, what does Trump’s team do? These stone cold idiots lose a shit ton of those undocumented kids at the border, separating them from their family (with multiple deaths of imprisoned kids reported). This is not a joke. It’s been widely known for many years that these ‘alien babies’ got sent to American foster homes via CPS, only to go missing and never be seen again.

Just like how CPS steals American kids from their biological parents under the guise of ‘abuse allegations’ so that these poor souls can be raped and murdered by the aliens of the evil Illuminati.

The last time I looked around there are a million damn video cameras everywhere on the streets and in buildings around the USA. How exactly does Trump and his admin lose track of so many kids without any video evidence left behind?

Why won’t Detroit PD release the surveillance camera footage of Chris Cornell’s bodyguard breaking down the door to his hotel room?

Why are you reading this report if you think it’s already a hoax?

Is it possible that maybe now the light finally went on in your head?

I sure hope so. Because somewhere a weeping child is standing alone in a dark room at this very moment being held captive and the face of their ‘alien captors’ is so frightening that the little one cries blood red tears before their head is decapitated, and their brains are eaten while the blood is still warm.

Maybe it’s time instead of calling everything a joke when you get exposed to this world’s most horrific realities that you put on your big boy pants and accept my wisdom. Now is the time to get real with yourself and the terrifying situation at hand.

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